A lot of us like a good mystery story - a book, a show or a game.
But for most, the love of mystery ends there.
In the actual living of our days, there is often a gross intolerance of Mystery and her sisters - chaos, void, questioning, adventure, discomfort, uncertainty, doubt and unknowability.
As a younger person I often felt less intelligent, aware, capable and beautiful when I compared myself to my peers. Since this was my experience I suppose it made ‘not knowing’ and ‘missing out’ on things a natural part of my life.
I would imagine how life would be for the intelligent, the wise, the desired and beautiful.
Sometimes I would smile helplessly and sometimes I would cry bitterly.
In both cases, I resigned to a life that was different in ways I couldn’t understand.
While this started off as a dense, negative and a hateful experience, it actually brought me to the crux of existential questioning - how to live in Great Mystery.
Mystery Mirror on the Wall
Mystery for me was a difficult and terrifying mirror to look into.
The things I thought made me and my life, less and unremarkable stared back at my from an infinite void folding into itself, wrapped in painful emotions, strung together with self-judgement.
Who we are when we stare into the abyss, reveals more than our truth.
It reveals where our power lies and often who our God truly is.
It never mattered how spiritual or loving I would quest to be.
When I looked into the mirror of my own Void, I saw my god as fear, and abandonment was my prayer.
For conscious and unconscious reasons, this is what I bowed to and what I repeated as a mantra. The fruits of those experiences were rage, despair, desperation, exhaustion, ill-health and the creation of personality interfaces to hide all of this from the world.
This is where and how I gave my power away in many ways without even realizing it.
Separation from our Great Source is a deep and painful wound.
Like an infinity mirror, it repeats itself in almost every aspect of life trying to get our attention, calling us to healing and integration.
At the time I had many deep and profound learnings and experiences of Oneness and Love. While that was immensely healing, it was also elusive and it drove me to quest for that feeling further.
This is Great Seduction; for what we do not know, drives our Soul.
In its lower expression, Great Seduction keeps us in escapism and pleasure seeking. Many of us stay in this cycle.
Here, we experience moments of great bliss and oneness; what some call ‘ascended, quantum or 5D experiences’ on one hand. We also experience the mundane, the stressful and the separate in linear 3D reality which causes us to desire leaving it behind and returning to our Oneness vibes. We experience both and the difference between the two - like the pain of love and longing.
When we are here, we are learning to build up to a completely different way of living. It is at important step; but if we get caught here, we cycle for longer than needed.
There is a gateway beyond.
In its higher expression, Great Seduction, like all seductions, can illuminate our consciousness to the resources of Self beyond what we thought ourselves capable.
Here, 5D magical experiences incorporate the 3D mundane ones and we start to live the mundane ,magically. Not by seeking, but by becoming.
To me this is where spiritual quests end, and living in illuminated self-Mastery begins.
That doesn’t mean we never need to come back here. Rather, we realize that the effort isn’t in the quest. It is in letting Life live itself out through us.
Such is the gift of Mystery.
Befriending the Mystery in the Mirror
As children most of us likely had a much healthier relationship with Great Mystery.
We would play games for the fun of it; making up and change rules along the way to include new friends when they joined.
We may have burst out of cars to go running into new parks and undiscovered simply to explore.
As babies, we took strange items from the everywhere and shoved them into our mouth to know them.
Maybe we craved bed-time stories of adventure, fantasy and wondered at magic tricks.
We would go to sleep and wake up without needing to know the plan of our day.
Even if we had rough childhoods, perhaps we stuck our hands deep into the dirt or crawled into a dark closet while playing hide and seek.
So how did Great Mystery, our once childhood friend, become this terrifying mirror of horrors?
I sometimes wonder if it is the same reason many adults have a hard time sleeping at night.
The resistance to surrendering into what is unknown and unseen; what we cannot control.
Power & the Void
From Great Mystery comes all power.
- Native Wisdom from the Sioux Nation
We all acknowledge some power in the unknown and the void, even if we don’t understood it.
It is sometimes simple, like when you want to know how the show or movie ends; or when someone who seems strange to us walks into our world. We get all curious and we are drawn to the source of this unknown factor.
But it is unimaginably bigger.
Say you lost your job and along with it your income, identity, worth and value, your sense of security and the place you through you were safe from uncertainty.
In the playground of Great Mystery, ‘who are you now?’ is the uncomfortable question that echos.
If you lost your identity, do you not exist? Are you still alive and breathing?
If you lost your income, did you lose your material power? Do you still have a body that you can you animate at will?
Does the loss of worth and value now, mean you are no longer worthy to walk this Earth? Do you believe you must immediately roll over and disintegrate into the soil?
What was the foundation of your safety and security? Was it made only from your paper job contract and virtual money in your bank account?
As much as we want to, we cannot move in the arena of Great Mystery from a place of the mind.
The mind will attempt to do what it does best - decipher inputs, pull on memories and experiences, present the safest way forward - based on the information available.
But in Mystery, we either do not have information or cannot know or see it.
This is where it can become paralyzing, overwhelming and we feel a panic because we cannot control an outcome in our life.
Here is where we may quest for safety, security, sameness and create structures of judgements and desires of control to help us along, comfortably.
Judgement and control are not bad things. But often, we use them to not feel, and so we prevent ourselves from our truths and our true power within.
Back to the playground of Great Mystery, the question of ‘who are you now?’ can feel like you are breaking apart.
Mostly, I found that the part of me that ‘feels like death and is dying’ in these moments was an aspect of my ego and identity refusing accept ‘failure and loss’. Again, ‘failure and loss’ are mind-constructs. Because what is getting undone, is a false sense of self and perhaps some attachments and identity structures.
To move through, we need trust in our guts, the radiance of our hearts and the release of what we were clenching. We also have feel our way to our own immeasurable truths.
It’s like a night time power outage in your home, where you can no longer see anything. You have to fumble and feel your way through with the help of your other senses and your spacial memory to find the candles and torches. Rational, vision based, mind constructs are less useful here.
When the ugliest truth of ourselves is revealed to us and we can still breathe and rest just for a while, in acceptance of this moment, we realize more Power than we ever thought possible.
This isn’t the type of power that is ‘given’ to us; therefore it cannot be taken.
This is Power that we realize, metabolize and simply exist with.
This is Power of the Void. This is also Power of the Spirit, for they are not separate.
Whether we are watching a detective mystery or coming to accept that we have no idea who we are and what we are going to do next, we come to know the medicine of Mystery, which is manifold.
It cannot be achieved. It has to be experienced and discovered.
For it to be experienced, we have to lay aside our mind’s run-abouts and the need to curate and control life experiences, ourselves and other people.
For it to be discovered, we, like our child selves, may have to sit on the floor with ourselves - with our emotions and thoughts, our tensions and dreams, our despairs and expectations, our pain and suffering - and learn to witness our realities and emotions rather than curse, avoid or deny them.
This is us building the necessary strength and honing out ability to witness our consciousness, wherever it is at. This is a required initiation before we step up to look at the infinitely unfolding abyss our ourselves, and take our seat at the throne of our own Power.
When we take our place, the experience changes.
It is no longer terrifying.
It is in Mystery, that we reclaim and reorient to our own Power centre.
It is in Mystery, that we perceive bliss in the Void, rather than fear.
It is in Mystery, where we self-nourish, just like dark deep soil nourishes seeds and roots.
Mystery transforms us from within and we begin to befriend and behold it within ourselves and within each other, as well as the world at large with love, with wonder and with grace.
Obstacles and problems loose their power in the face of no-thing-ness, and they become the playthings of our Radiance Being.
Because the Void is unknown to itself, judgements and controls aren’t really present here. How can you judge what you do not know? How can you control what is beyond material? And so, it becomes a curiosity and an adventure.
We walk knowingly, confident that we do not know, and we burst in spontaneous laughter!
We start to see the evil or darkness in the linear world, as unclaimed Voids in the Quantum world.
The experience of resonance opens up, which is a juicy joy of Mystery. It’s magnetic nature, opens up our manifestation as we draw our dreams and our desires towards ourselves by simply Being, rather than effort and questing.
We find ourselves as humbled by order as by chaos, movement and stillness, limits and infinity.
Rules, ideologies, philosophies, prescriptions and judgements of how to live our lives gives way to the dance of creative and destructive forces of Life.
Now we live in true Union. That place we have quested for, for longer than we can remember. We have arrived.
How Great Mystery Activates Our Deeper Knowing
Someone told me the other day that they were terrified at the Transhumanism movement. They had previously mentioned their dread of CBDCs and how they lost money in the FTX crash.
There are so many unideal things we hear about and witness and we get afraid and feel hopeless, for ourselves, our families and our world.
Here we stay, stuck the cycle of trying to make sense of the senseless, to control the uncontrollable and try so hard to stay sane amidst cruel insanity.
The world’s current state however isn’t a solvable mystery. Nor is it a fixable problem. Our individual states aren’t either.
The way I see it: we are coming to experience ourselves more expansively than we have before.
This isn’t about solving mysteries like a detective. Rather, this is an immense acceptance of all we do not know and trusting our deepest Self to walk forward.
When we have powerful experiences around our wholeness, we behold ourselves as one with the Cosmos and infinite. These are sacred moments.
Part of infinity is the incomprehensibility of it. So in those moments, we are also One with all that is beyond us.
As such, there is no thing to fear. No amount of uncertainty, doubt or unknowability troubles us when we are in One with our Spirit and Mystery, and this is what allows us to take our activated power and bring it into the world.
We may be afraid or enraged that God doesn’t exist.
We may be panicked and desperate because we are lost and empty.
We may be wrapped in blame and shame, separate from aspects of our World.
We may be hopeless and exhausted right now.
We may feel all of that and more.
And yet, in the expanse of Great Mystery, all of this simply is and is not at the same time.
Once this is absorbed in our mind and in our cells, we get to live, love and accept from a much deeper place.
It is my belief that Knowing ourselves, including the parts we can never know, is actually a gateway to truer more authentic relationships with each other and with our Earth.
But… what do I know?!