As a child growing up in South Asian and Middle Eastern cultures I heard a lot of poems, stories and songs about the Moon. These appear often in movies or cultural festivals based on the lunar calendar, but we also had to study some in school.
I never got it.
Surely, someone who is poetic can script words and sentences about directly about person they love, right? Isn’t that the job of a poet? Why are there 15 paragraphs about the Moon?
I thought it was a lump is nonsense and a waste of everyone’s time, especially mine.
So, when I was healing, decades later and came across the craft of astrology and relationship humans have to the Moon and Stars, I was tentative about it, at best.
I was lucky, because right at the start of this journey, I met an amazing astrologer, who helped me understand compassion and acceptance of Self, through the lens of astrology. This allowed me to walk past my uncertainty and dive in, even though I wasn’t sure how my findings would help my cause.
One of my favourite teachings of Astrology is this: while we learn to work with certain planetary energies in certain areas of life, we are in fact every planet, every star, every zodiac sign and every energy. In this way, we learn to work with the specificities of ourselves while keeping the perspective of our wholeness.
Most people approach astrology with amusement or when they want a prediction.
For me, it need was far more practical.
I learned how the ancients used the energy and octaves of certain planets to amplify or mute energies in the body for health and healing.
I learned to watch and eventually comes to neutral witness of my emotional states with much greater space and allowance, which ended up helping me evolve out of patterns of self-deception, self-hatred and passive aggression.
For those familiar with astrology, all this happened for me during my Saturn Return. For those unfamiliar with astrology, a Saturn Return is a transit that occurs every ~28years in a person’s life when the planet returns to the same point it was at during our birth. Some people breeze through theirs and hardly notice it. I was not one of those people. I’m actually surprised I lived through mine, as it shattered me in so many ways; a of people don’t.
Because Saturn is associated with disciple and authority, I felt like I couldn’t trust any teacher at the time. I was so afraid and vulnerable that I closed off to learning from others. So, I took just under 3 years and kept a Lunar calendar - a daily diary where I recorded my emotions, my dreams and things I couldn’t figure out.
I had no idea why I was doing this, aside from the fact that it was something to do. During this period I stopped reading, watching TV and listening to music. I cut myself off from any form of enjoyment. I barely went out and I had 3 friends whom I rarely saw. Most of my evening were spent on my bedroom floor, hunched over this lunar diary sobbing and scribbling, clutching a crystal, surrounded by tissues.
I wasn’t much fun back then. It was certainly extreme and while I was incredibly lonely (self-imposed), I did learned a lot.
Because I wrote down so much, I started seeing patterns. Especially after the first year.
Much like ancient folks did when they looked into the sky and created star patterns -that we call constellations.
From the patterns, emerged hidden beliefs, thoughts, ideas, memories from my past or something I understood (or misunderstood) as a child.
It is as if you are missing puzzle pieces your whole life, and then someone gives you a bag of them. Things just start fitting together, and once you know what is, then you can start making different choices and seeing different outcomes.
Astrology didn’t save my life or heal me. I worked with a lot of other healing modalities during that period. But it was such a potent medicine for me, as it allowed me to see and accept who I am.
Lunar Activities
On new and full moons, even today, when my mother asks me what I will be doing. I answer gleefully: “Lunar Activities!”.
Not because, I want to maintain an air of mystery, but mostly because even I do not know what I will do, until I do it.
Such, is my relationship with the Moon.
As much a sobbed and cried while writing in my lunar diary, I did love writing in it.
Lunar diaries illustrate every phase of the Moon on each day of the year, along with major planetary transits. It’s a great way to learn astrology yourself, using your daily happenings, your life, your choices, your people, your emotions, thoughts, desires, expectations, letdowns and dreams as a guinea-pig.
It’s like you get to map out the story of you, while also seeing the larger Cosmic Arc. It’s really hard to stay stuck and self-centred when you are constantly faced with the truth that you a brilliant tiny fractal of larger infinite Cosmos.
The Moon is said to rule our emotions, our inner tides, our dreamtime.
For me, the Moon is also about relationship - to all beings and everything.
Loonie - the Money Story
I greatly resisted learning about money and finances for most of my life - personal and that of the world - until I could live in fear no longer.
The Canadian one-dollar coin has a bird on it called the Loon. The coin is loving called a loonie.
If you’ve ever heard a loon call, they sound crazy. They are especially rambunctious and chatty during full moons or when the moon is closer to Earth than it normally is.
After I had done my deep learning about markets, US economy, truths about the Fed, crypto and De-Fi, Gold and silver etc, I knew I had to keep up my learning, because after all, things were changing and I wanted to know what way the tide would turn (pun-intended).
I’ve heard people argue about which investments and stocks are ‘the best’ and what Down & Jones are up to today, but no-one talks about about emotional money matters are. The personal and collective fear and terror of loss; helplessness that makes people give up their sovereignty and freedom just so they don’t have to see their kids go hungry; the dread of what must be done simply to keep a roof over your head or have heat during the coming winter; just to name a few.
I’ve known people with a lot of money who are amongst the poorest people I have ever known; I also have experienced generosity of those who have a few coins to their name.
For me, there was no separating personal and collective emotion from matters of coin. So, I leaned in and embraced it.
I am not an investor-type person, so I knew I wouldn’t dedicate hours every week to playing with trades. I am also not a very structured person and I tend to choose ritual and vibration more than a to-do list.
I heard an astrologer describe the Capricorn sign as the ‘accountant of the Zodiac’. I’m sure she explained why, but I had stopped listening, because I had an idea that would help me keep up my continued learning! It was so bizarre an idea, that it sounded like a loon call, which was even more amazing.
I planed ahead for several months, marking dates in my calendar when the Moon was in Capricorn (which happened every month). During those 2-3 days every month, I’d know it was time to do some bookkeeping, financial planning, catching up on crypto and definitely videos and pondering my portfolio. I’d light a candle, set my intention and go about my money matters. I even found a shiny looney that I would keep next to my lit candle, in honour of all that I was learning and the emotional connectivity with the Moon.
It worked for me because my fear with money was a barrier to having an actual healthy relationship with wealth and money. What arose was a relationship that changed and evolved (like the phases of the Moon), while also helping me feel stable as I built trust, new foundations and confidence in my abilities (reflection and relationship with self).
Reflection & Connection
New and full moons are a time of re-connection to nature’s tides, to the cosmos and to monthly blood cycles (for those who bleed). There is an immense relief that comes from allowing ourselves to release things we’ve been holding onto, through the days and weeks.
It’s like cosmic permission to take a bit of time and space, turn inward and lovingly allow what lies just underneath the surface to rise. Just like we practice brushing our teeth to maintain oral health, I see taking time time to reflect and re-connect as essential for maintaining mental, emotional, physical, psychic and spiritual health.
The beauty is, no-one can tell you when you need.
Only you know that. Some of us may need quiet time in delightful solitude.
Others may really need to gather with intimate friends and family.
Maybe both are needed!
The other phases of the moon are called waxes and wanes. While there is a lot more focus on new and full moons, I’ve gained a greater appreciation for these other faces of the moon. They are a dance of light and shadow, making several parallels to what we may experience through our weeks. The many faces of the moon have taught me that not all shadow is bad and dark, so, these days especially, I’m learning new ways to handle what feels like a fight, a resistance and opposition to lightness. This is how, I think, it becomes a dance.
If nothing else, the Moon reminds us that we can shine brightly in the dark, and that is a beautiful thing.
Unlike the Sun, that symbolizes our conscious mind, the Moon shines its light on the unconscious, the infinite, the mystical and all that is beyond words and capture.
I finally understand a little more why so many dedicate their pens and scroll to writing about the Moon.
It’s allure, is such that you can know it and see it and feel it and write about it… and as soon as you do, the form and shape changes.
It is that part of ourselves that beckons us to our edges like the most sensual of lovers, dancing at the edge of our desire pulling us towards them… then as quickly changing shape, so that we don’t get attached. We keep moving and keep playing the dance of shadow and light.
Such is the generosity of MoonLight.
Where ever you are today, if you get to go outside in the night and behold the sky above you, may you remember that you are lit from Within.